P.S.: Contents of the Sub-Zero Sandwich

It’s over, for now at least. We’ve just come through the other, warmer side of a weather cycle that was at times pretty frigid. The season has been pretty cold on the whole so far, but last week was downright brutal. To put it in context, today it never really got above 20 degrees Fahrenheit and it felt positively balmy.

Writing my last post about some of the stranger and funnier issues relating to dressing in severely cold weather here in Vermont brought into stark relief some of the common misconceptions people have about dressing when the temperatures really drop. I thought it might be helpful, therefore, to take a few moments to explain exactly how to, and how not to, dress.

First things first: the sheer number of layers one wears when the temperatures make Vermont feel like Siberia are of absolutely no consequence. If I had a dime for everyone who froze while expressing disbelief that their sixteen layers were not keeping them warm, I’d have enough money for a really good cup of herbal tea (more on that later). When I point this out to people, a common response is something to the effect of “but I’m wearing two Under Armour shirts.” Congratulations on your brand choice. Every major sporting goods company and outdoor gear manufacturer sells some sort of high quality first layer which is intended to sit next to the skin and wick moisture away from the body. Wicking is a good thing, we like wicking, but wicking layers covered by yet more wicking layers leaves us dry, very dry, and cold.

Another prime example of a high tech, gee-wiz material that is both expensive and fashionable but is a terrible insulator is “soft shell fleece”. Soft shells are great pieces of clothing, but they are a barrier with very little loft. Wearing a soft shell and hoping it keeps you warm would be like foregoing fiberglass insulation in the rafters of your house because you think the Tyvek will be enough.

The key element in dressing for severely cold weather is loft. No, not “The Loft”, as in our classic ski town watering hole here at Okemo, but “loft” as in insulation. Think puffy, as in old-school, quilted down jackets. The puffier, the better. The more loft there is in a piece of clothing, the more air is trapped inside that garment and the better its insulating properties. If we’re dry because we’re wearing a good first layer, we have layers that add loft on top of that, and it’s all topped off with some sort of barrier against wind and the elements, we stand a good chance of staying warm. In addition, the most important factor for keeping hands and feet warm is to keep the body’s core warm. So, since we can’t exactly ski or snowboard in down booties, focus on the important organs in the core and the feet are less likely to start looking cadaverous. Be aware that just because your new Spyder, Burton or Arcteryx jacket was expensive and is made from a super-double-top-secret multi-membrane shell material and is insulated does not mean it’ll keep you warm enough. Go big, go fat, get puffy, then put your stylish jacket on top. Just in case you have trouble getting the picture, I've included one above.

The photo shows my personal system for what we call "The Nuclear Option" for use only when the temperatures on the hill reach well below zero Fahrenheit. In the top row, from left to right, are a long sleeve first layer made of gee-wiz wicking material, a thick zip-neck second layer, and a fleece cardigan third layer (containing no barriers, just thick, fluffy fleece). In the bottom row are a no-frills down sweater for layer number four and a quilted, insulated vest for layer number five. On top of all of this goes my shell uniform jacket for the sixth and final layer.

Once you’re dressed properly (done correctly, you should look and feel like the Michelin tire man), there are a few other important issues to consider. Seriously. First, when the temperatures drop into single digits Fahrenheit and below, it’s important to not have any exposed skin. It takes very little time for exposed skin to become frostbitten in certain conditions, so do yourself a favor and cover up your face. Frostbite hurts a ton, it renders you susceptible to recurrences far more easily, and leaves you looking like a leper for some time. I’ve done my nose, cheeks and chin, and I know from personal experience that it’s not worth it to be a tough guy. Second, eat. Staying warm when it’s arctic outside takes a lot of energy - we burn a lot of calories just standing around, so eat plenty. Third, stay away from caffeine. Physiologically, it impedes your body’s ability to stay warm and can lend a false sense of how warm one is staying out there.

My last piece of advice is to anticipate getting cold, don’t wait for it to come to you. In other words: go inside, frequently.

If all else fails, go cross country skiing. As long as one has no exposed skin, one can cross country ski in severely cold weather and break a nice sweat, stay warm, get some exercise, not wait in lift lines, and still enjoy a day outdoors in the middle of winter in some beautiful surrounds. You might even enjoy it.